{"id":241,"date":"2020-06-04T11:10:09","date_gmt":"2020-06-04T11:10:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/?p=241"},"modified":"2020-06-04T11:11:48","modified_gmt":"2020-06-04T11:11:48","slug":"my-new-fridge","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/?p=241","title":{"rendered":"My New fridge"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p> is taller than my head<br> wider than my wingspan <br> bigger inside than out.<br> &nbsp;<br> You could keep a corpse inside<br> (once you\u2019d cut it in half <br> and frozen the legs.)<br> &nbsp;<br> My new fridge\/freezer <br> was a rocket in its former life.<br> Smooth, sleek, white<br> various logos emblazoned<br> on its aerodynamic sheen.<br> &nbsp;<br> Brace yourself and wear weighted boots<br> before you click open the door \u2013<br> in tinted visor and factor 50, be prepared <br> for arctic blast and halogen glare<br> to bleach your earthly senses.<br> &nbsp;<br> With gloved hand<br> enjoy the smooth, seductive glide <br> of durable plastic, translucent shelves<br> laboratory clean<br> &nbsp;<br> no carrot top fronds<br> or congealed yoghurt crumble \u2013<br> everything is<br> exactly where it should be. <br> &nbsp;<br> If I move the wine rack up<br> and hold my breath<br> I can just about fit in<br> &nbsp;<br> and close the door. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>is taller than my head wider than my wingspan bigger inside than out. &nbsp; You could keep a corpse inside (once you\u2019d cut it in half and frozen the legs.) &nbsp; My new fridge\/freezer was a rocket in its former life. Smooth, sleek, white various logos emblazoned on its aerodynamic sheen. &nbsp; Brace yourself and wear weighted boots before you click open the door \u2013 in tinted visor and factor 50, be prepared for arctic blast and halogen glare to bleach your earthly senses. &nbsp; With gloved hand enjoy the smooth, seductive glide of durable plastic, translucent shelves laboratory clean &nbsp; no carrot top fronds or congealed yoghurt crumble \u2013 everything is exactly where it should be. &nbsp; If I move the wine rack up and hold my breath I can just about fit in &nbsp; and close the door. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":243,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[15],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/vicpickup.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/latrach-med-jamil-Eb6hMEhGlKY-unsplash-1-scaled.jpg?fit=2027%2C2560&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=241"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":245,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/241\/revisions\/245"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/243"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=241"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=241"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vicpickup.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=241"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}